


The Sense of Loss

by baeksdoodle



Series: tiny sparks drabbles ✨ [3]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Depression, Heavy Themes, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, life and death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:00:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25398058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeksdoodle/pseuds/baeksdoodle
Summary: Looking back, it was selfish of Death to long after Life.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Oh Sehun
Series: tiny sparks drabbles ✨ [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1805227
Comments: 9
Kudos: 22
Collections: Challenge #5 — Opposites Attract





	The Sense of Loss

**Author's Note:**

> thank you to mod N for once again, being such a great mod and helping me bc i'm a little dumb :(

It is not often when Life and Death are in the same room.

A new mother lays weak in her bed, alone in a dilapidated home, a newborn held within her frail arms. She doesn’t notice Death standing next to her, nor does she feel his lips when they gently brush over hers. The pain that had once coursed through her body ebbs away until there’s only an overwhelming numbness. Taking her final breath, her eyes slip closed for the last time.

Death doesn’t leave. He watches the newborn open its eyes, breathing in life, reaching a tiny hand out towards him, and although he knows not to mess with the balance of life and death, he carefully takes the child into his arms. The child, although newly born, doesn’t shed a tear but instead looks Death right in the eyes.

_A child so vulnerable, who has yet to fear anything. Even death itself._

Death leaves the child in front of an orphanage, for once hoping that they won’t see each other again. Not for a long time.

  
  
  
  


It’s a story that no one believes. 

“I promise it happened! A big black wolf brought me the apples when I went into the woods.”

Not everyone will believe a ten-year-old who prattled a tale about being given a basket of red apples, which he had taken with him back to the orphanage.

“Liar,” a little girl sneers, her gaunt face smeared with dirt. “Mother said you stole them and that’s why you have to sleep outside in the shed.”

“I swear…” Baekhyun sniffles, “I’m not a liar.”

But the only reply that comes is the sound of the door slamming shut before he’s shrouded in darkness.

  
  
  
  
  


A seventeen-year-old Baekhyun sits at the edge of a cliff, watching as waves crash below his feet. Freezing wind whips hair and creates goosebumps that stiffen along his arms. In the distance, the sea is dark and murky and the sky is dull and grey.

He wonders why he’s here and he thinks, would it be so bad if he just disappeared.

Someone suddenly sits down next to him, and he looks up to meet their eyes. He sees a man, all dressed in black, perhaps only a few years older than he is.

“It’s not safe to sit so close to an open sea,” the man says. In his hand resides a single red apple. Baekhyun thinks he remembers something, but then it’s gone. 

“Have… we met before?” he asks the man, taking in his side profile as the man looks out at the sea. Baekhyun stares too long at the man’s handsome features, and he quickly averts his gaze when the man looks back to him.

“Perhaps we have,” the man says, placing the fruit in Baekhyun’s open palms.

A sense of familiarity washes over him, yet he can’t pinpoint the cause of it. “Who are you?” he inquires.

“You can call me… Sehun,” he answers, “Now tell me, people only come out here for one reason, what is troubling you?”

There’s a strange comfort in Sehun that makes Baekhyun open up, and he tells Sehun about his life, about how he had grown up in an orphanage. He tells Sehun about his family that had adopted him when he was twelve and how his father had caught him kissing the newspaper boy. He mentions that he’s never been interested in girls, expecting for his companion to act the way his father had, with nothing but disgust, however, nothing comes.

Sehun only listens.

And by the time he’s finished, it’s as if a crushing weight has been lifted from his chest. 

“Is it so wrong to be in love with another boy?” he asks quietly, his head bowed in defeat.

Sehun is silent for a moment, before he eventually speaks, “Love isn’t something that’s necessarily restricted, and when it starts to feel limited, then is it really love? How can you put limitations on an emotion that knows none?” Sehun stands up then and offers his hand, one that Baekhyun so easily takes. “Now come, Baekhyun, the sun is setting. I’ll take you home.”

Later that night, Baekhyun lies awake in bed, mulling over Sehun’s words. 

As exhaustion overtakes him, he realises he never gave Sehun his name.

  
  
  
  


Sehun doesn’t understand what draws him to Baekhyun. He, an immortal entity, infatuated with a being whose life can be snuffed out in an instant, like the flame of a burning candle.

When Baekhyun’s thoughts are dark, darker than they’ve ever been, Sehun finds himself there to comfort him, something that goes against his beliefs. And each time they meet, the flame that flickers in Baekhyun’s eyes grows.

Love. Sehun speaks of it like he understands, but he doesn’t—love is merely another emotion.

Yet Baekhyun makes him feel something he’s never experienced before.

And he toys with fate, selfishly keeping Baekhyun alive for longer than the life that fate had destined upon him.

  
  
  
  


Baekhyun is twenty-four. A sudden illness has overtaken his body and he knows he doesn’t have long left. He blinks his bleary eyes open and sees Sehun next to his bed. Although he knows his life is coming to an end, he smiles weakly. "You've finally come for me."

"You know what I am?"

"You only come when I want to die, and now I am dying."

"Are you not afraid?"

"No, I’ll never be afraid of you. Thank you... for watching over me."

This time, Sehun cannot save him. 

With a heavy heart, he leans down and kisses Baekhyun on the lips, watching the flame that was once burning in Baekhyun’s eyes flicker and dim until there's nothing left.

  
  
  
  


There is no afterlife. 

You merely exist and then you don’t. 

Fate had decided to take matters into her own hands, taking the life that Sehun had so selfishly kept, and now he will grieve with the loss of the only human he will love for the rest of his eternity.


End file.
